{"id":3977,"date":"2015-06-22T15:46:07","date_gmt":"2015-06-22T15:46:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/heatherhaley.com\/hh2\/?p=3977"},"modified":"2015-06-22T16:57:16","modified_gmt":"2015-06-22T16:57:16","slug":"beyond-biology-happy-fathers-day","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/heatherhaley.com\/hh2\/?p=3977","title":{"rendered":"Beyond Biology-Happy Fathers Day"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/heatherhaley.com\/hh2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/06\/MeKyle.jpg\"><img data-attachment-id=\"3983\" data-permalink=\"http:\/\/heatherhaley.com\/hh2\/?attachment_id=3983\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/heatherhaley.com\/hh2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/06\/MeKyle.jpg?fit=604%2C465\" data-orig-size=\"604,465\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"Me&#038;Kyle\" data-image-description=\"\" data-medium-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/heatherhaley.com\/hh2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/06\/MeKyle.jpg?fit=300%2C230\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/heatherhaley.com\/hh2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/06\/MeKyle.jpg?fit=604%2C465\" decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-medium wp-image-3983\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/heatherhaley.com\/hh2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/06\/MeKyle.jpg?resize=300%2C230\" alt=\"Me&amp;Kyle\" width=\"300\" height=\"230\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/heatherhaley.com\/hh2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/06\/MeKyle.jpg?resize=300%2C230 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/heatherhaley.com\/hh2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/06\/MeKyle.jpg?w=604 604w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" data-recalc-dims=\"1\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>I honour good fathers because my father was not. Danny tried but his parents damaged him so badly he couldn&#8217;t express love or approval, probably more vital than food and shelter. Years later I discovered that due to paternity fraud, he actually wasn&#8217;t my biological dad. Maybe he sensed it too, maybe that&#8217;s why he withheld. <em>C&#8217;est la vie<\/em>. I loved him fiercely anyway, despite everything. To attach, bond, is innate. Unless it&#8217;s beaten out of us.<\/p>\n<p>Got a dialogue going on Facebook. Al Razutis pointed out that &#8220;There\u2019s more to fatherhood than biology.&#8221; Of course there is. I&#8217;d just like to know who the bastard was that spawned me. Don&#8217;t we all? I suppose it&#8217;s difficult for ambivalent feelings not to surface on Fathers Day. Turns out my friend Shelly da Cuhna had a similar experience, and Thesa Pakarnyk said, &#8220;Whomever spawned you missed out big time on knowing such an amazing woman!&#8221; Thank you but I\u2019ll never know what I missed out on either. I harbour no illusions, fantasies though. The guy might be a complete jerk, or even a rapist, but I want to know my genetic makeup. Not just for my sake but also for my son&#8217;s. There can be long term health issues. If I was rich I\u2019d hire a private investigator or at the very least, sign up with one of those DNA tracking sites. Elee Kraljii Garniner remarked, \u201cHeather, beautiful sentiment. Here&#8217;s to a new model of fatherliness.\u201d And I agree. That\u2019s what needs to happen. I see it happening. Most men today are far more loving and hands-on as parents.<\/p>\n<p>I wanted to post a picture of my <em>Dad<\/em> but have none digitized, so here is a shot of me and my beloved nephew Kyle Thiessen, my (half) sister&#8217;s son and his full-blooded grandson.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I honour good fathers because my father was not. Danny tried but his parents damaged him so badly he couldn&#8217;t express love or approval, probably more vital than food and shelter. Years later I discovered that due to paternity fraud, he actually wasn&#8217;t my biological dad. Maybe he sensed it too, maybe that&#8217;s why he [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[4],"tags":[413],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/heatherhaley.com\/hh2\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3977"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/heatherhaley.com\/hh2\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/heatherhaley.com\/hh2\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/heatherhaley.com\/hh2\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/heatherhaley.com\/hh2\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3977"}],"version-history":[{"count":11,"href":"http:\/\/heatherhaley.com\/hh2\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3977\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3990,"href":"http:\/\/heatherhaley.com\/hh2\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3977\/revisions\/3990"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/heatherhaley.com\/hh2\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3977"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/heatherhaley.com\/hh2\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3977"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/heatherhaley.com\/hh2\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3977"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}